I'll do anying, you'll do anything too
In the Beginning was The Word …
… and God switched off in disgust!
You eat a slug, snog a Gran, they put you late on Channel 4, that's the plan, just 15 seconds, no great loss, they're seen no more, who gives a toss.
Primetime beckons only those who've got the skill to woo the crowd, popculture kings, who thrill the viewers, proud to say that they've got talent.
I've got talent, you've got talent, Britain doesn't need to fear us.
In trendy rooms, till late at night, we're the only ones who'll hear us.
The good old days, all new faces, taking places, waiting for what Bob says …. Bob says … Bob says nothing, Bob is dead, Marty too, now it's Ant and Dec who press the buttons,
take the cheques, and leave the public full of cheese - they're wanting more - it's such a tease to see who'll win; an extras show, extended crap, you never know it could be you,
a jumping rabbit, singing nun, a lucky few, who've all got talent.
I've got talent, you've got talent, Britain doesn't want to see us.
We're not pretty, we're not dumb, who on Earth would want to be us.
Spend a summer with big brother, win a science show.
And eating slugs now primetime viewing … ?! For God's Sake, NOOOOO!!!
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