Teenage Angst

Most of these poems were written between 1992 and 1994. This was the height of my creative burst; not only were most of my poems from this period but this was when I was writing stories too - my output since then has been, until very recently, very small indeed!

You will notice during this timeframe a couple of common themes. At the time, for reasons still completely unknown, started to think deeply about someone I hadn't actually seen since primary school - and ended up developing a weird crush on her. I couldn't explain it then and I certainly can't explain it now. Gawd I even told her too, she must have thought I was completely bonkers!

Of course, thinking these things and not having her meant that I started to think about not having *anyone*, and so I started to feel a bit lonely and lovelorn. This led to poems like "Loneliness" and "Real Life", in mid-'93.

The end of the period coincided with the end of my first year at University (June '94). I'd started fancying this girl called Megan, but, well see the section below for how that went! Maybe I got a bit disillusioned with women after that point, but not long afterwards, I had my first contact with a lady called Joanne, and thus was my lovelife page begun!

  • Loneliness
    There were times for most of my Secondary School life where I felt like this, but it was only in '92/'93, in the last few months of my time there, that I finally got round to putting these feelings down on paper. It's a little sensationalist, extreme, but it was how I was feeling at the time. Dated 21 January 1993.
  • 24th February Poem to a Girl on a Train
    I went back by train from an Open Day at Birmingham University (on 24 February 1993, surprisingly enough!!), and sat opposite a girl who I found really attractive and appealed to me instantly. All I remember about her was she was going to Wigan (I glanced at her ticket when the inspector came round). We never spoke a word; smiled at each other at the very start (one of those shy, embarrassed smiles) and that was all. I wrote the poem while she slept. I wanted to fold it up and put it in her bag but I never had the nerve! I have no idea who she was or anything, she probably wouldn't remember anyway!
  • Teenage Words
    At the time, I had a real problem with other people my age. I found them horrid, immature, and too easily led into fashions and opinions. There was no room in their eyes for an independent soul like me. The poem was written as a response to it.
  • Real Life
    Or at least how I saw real life at the time (and just over 10 years later I wonder just how much has changed!). It's a poem about loneliness, about being without love, and shows that if you really want something you tend to promote all the virtues without thinking of the bad sides. I guess it describes how, in those days, I viewed perfect, romantic love, which of course with hindsight I now find is unobtainable.
  • Untitled Number One
    I guess I must have been a bit obsessed. Note that she never knew about these poems I wrote about her; this was probably for the best I feel. Not that it made much a difference in the long run, but, oh well. I couldn't think of a title for this poem, none seemed to fit.
  • Why?
    Completed 20 November 03, not sure when it was started - it was in my "mixed poetry" file for many years and I'd guess it comes from '93. Again I merged this with another poetic note that I'm certain relates to that girl from Primary School (because I did drop her a note!), so in effect this poem is just over exactly 10 years late! It didn't take too much fiddling to get this into a final form. Note I seem to have a fetish for glancing at women on trains ...
  • Untitled and Unknown Poem
    Completed 20 November 03. That's about all I know about this, except it's been lurking round my poetry file for a good 10 years. I would guess it's a poem about me writing a poem about someone, probably the same girl as most of these are. Not sure it's even finished, in which case it probably never will be. A truly lost poem from my Teenage Angst years.
  • Triolet about some unknown woman in my dreams
    Written 13 December 03, but the original initial couplet was written some time in the early 90s. I had no idea what to do with the lines, but then I discovered the Triolet! I think it fits in well with the longing for women that most of the other poems in this section infer.

  • © Copyright 1992-2003, Ian T Oliver. No copying of these poems is authorised.
    Back to the Writings Page